Dream Tracker
". . . when you want to sleep, you want to sleep. Dreaming is work. Next thing you know, I have to build a go-cart with my ex-landlord." - Mitch Hedberg
February 19, 2012: At a construction site, Betty White was single-handedly holding up an earthen embankment. The bulldozers kept adding more earth, and Betty kept resisting. After the workers' yelling produced no result, I went down to speak with her. She agreed to move out of the way.
January 16, 2011: I built a chair out of bricks and mortar. The chair was one of a kind, and I was determined to sell it on Craigslist. Potential buyers kept telling me, "man it looks great - but it's so uncomfortable! You can look at it, but you can't sit in it."
June 9, 2010: I was working my way up through the minor leagues. Unlike the other pitching prospects, I threw semi-round produce. No baseballs - just limes, garlic, onions and so forth.
February 28, 2010: Somewhere in East Berlin, an old block of Communist era buildings was about to come down. I told those around me that the explosion would be way louder than anyone could imagine. Indeed, the blast was far louder than I expected, and while the block-shaped structures whined and groaned in the dust, they remained upright. People yelled "be careful - they could fall at any moment!" I couldn't stay away and dashed around in the shadows trying for a last glimpse through a window or down a cellar stair, using my eyes and mind like the camera I wished I had brought.
A second dream concerned big cats - lions, tigers, and the like - and I investigated whether they get hairballs like house cats do. And if so, how big would those hairballs be? I concluded that only male lions get hairballs, and giant ones, due to their long mane.
January 9, 2010: I was driving a big rig with a huge bulldozer loaded on the trailer. I've never done that before, but somehow I felt confident that I could handle the truck, and it's cargo. After pulling up in a retail parking lot I carefully parked the rig between a row of cars. I backed the brand new Cat off its trailer, and again mindful of the parked cars, made a few tenuous efforts at the blacktop below. At first nothing but scrapes - then the blade bit in and I really went in deep, testing the new dozer's power to its limits. A bit too far according to the reactions of nervous onlookers, yet in this strangely forceful yet delicate process, none of the customer's automobiles were damaged.
September 12, 2009: A skeleton chased me, and threw peanut butter and jelly sandwiches at me. He always missed - but just barely. This desparate chase ended with me slamming shut a screen door, just in time to block yet another flying pb&j sandwich.
August 28, 2009: I was rollerblading on various surfaces, including rough brick, packed snow, and a smooth marble-like surface. I also encountered many blocked off areas, which I bypassed with great consternation. I didn't mind trudging through the rough areas, and whenever I got going on a smooth patch I raced as fast as possible, and didn't want to stop for any obstacle or potential danger. There were many people who I passed at great speed, some of whom seemed supportive, while others gave the impression of annoyance or disapproval. I was racing hard at the end and, after charging into an intersection, was nearly struck by a car. I fell to the ground and initially thought I was uninjured, only to discover that I was missing a tooth.